Cast Iron Shrimp and Grits

August 1st I am totally going to date myself here, but does anyone remember the sitcom Alice? The show revolved around a single mom (Linda Lavin) who lost her husband in a trucking accident (great start to a sitcom). She travels from New Jersey to Phoenix with her son in the hopes of starting a singing career. She ends up at a diner called Mel's (a real diner by the way) and takes a job as a waitress. In this greasy spoon, she meets a handful of colorful characters including Mel (Vic Tayback), a grumpy cook and proprietor, who no matter what time of day always has some sort of grease stain on his apron. Then there was Vera, a neurotic dingbat employee who screws everything up, yet continues to be employed. Finally, there was Flo, a sassy waitress who came up with the classic TV sitcom line "Kiss My Grits!" I have no idea what this actually means. I know 1970s TV would never allow "Kiss my Ass," however you have to wonder which part of the human anatomy a grit is. I am pretty sure she was not being literal and actually wanted the person she was insulting to put their face in a bowl of grits and make out. That would not only burn the customer, but cause a hefty lawsuit to an establishment that saw only three of the same customers each day. After all, look at Mel - he is the reason we don't see chefs when they cook, or airline pilots when they fly, etc. Yet, Flo would throw this around much like Gary Coleman in Different Strokes with "What you talking about Willis?" Sure, not as dangerous, but you had to wonder if Mr. Drummond wasn't clubbing poor Arnold over the head with heavy objects on a daily basis. And what of poor Willis? Can you imagine Willis sitting by the TV with his defective little brother? What kind of conversations would they have? "Hey Arnold, can you pass the remote?" "What you talkin' about Willis?" (audience laughter) "The remote, the thing right next to you." "What you talkin' about Willis?" (audience snicker) "THE F$%#ING REMOTE, ITS RIGHT NEXT TO YOU! CAN YOU GIVE IT TO ME!!!" "What you talkin about Willis?" (audience groans) "THAT'S IT, YOU ARE GETTING A BEATING!" "What you . . .ARGGHHHH." (audience laughter) You wonder why Willis and the rest of that cast ended up prostitutes or drug addicts. Can you say digress? I knew you could. Anyway, in honor of Flo I made a recipe that is a favorite in the Ferguson household - Shrimp and Grits. First - preheat the oven to 375 and take .5 lb of peeled and de-veined shrimp and toss it with a clove of minced garlic, 1 tbs of olive oil and a pinch of cayenne pepper and put that in the fridge. While its marinating, take a 10 inch skillet and heat 1 tbs of butter over medium heat. Once that is melted, add 1 small onion minced and cook until soft - about 3-5 minutes. Add 1.5 cups of water, .5 cup of heavy cream, some hot sauce (you decide), .5 tsp of salt and .25 tsp of pepper and bring that to a boil over medium heat. Then, take .5 cup of quick grits and slowly add while whisking, then reduce the heat to low stirring vigorously. Continue until the grits get nice and creamy - usually takes about 5 minutes, but you can tell. When the grits have reached desired consistency, take off the heat and add a cup of shredded SHARP cheddar, preferably white, and stir. Remember that shrimp? Well, we need it. Take the shrimp and put it in the hot grits until halfway submerged and stick the whole production in the oven for 5-7 minutes. Done. Couple of things to remember. Make sure your skillet is oven safe (plastic handles = no). Make sure you use quick grits, not instant or regular. Instant will turn your recipe into Spackle, and regular will make your grits crunchy like cat litter. I served this recipe with some spinach, but you can choose just about any veggie you like. It's very tasty and really simple. Until I post again I say, "kiss my grits."