Moley Moley Mole

October 10th No, I'm not going to write about skin blemishes, I'll save that post for another time. I'm also not going to go on a Mike Myers movie retrospective. What I am going to do is share a sauce recipe that will dress up chicken nicely - and it has chocolate in it! Beautiful. I've had this dish in Mexico and although my version is not authentic, it still has a little spice, and frankly, who's going to know? Well, you are, I just told you. Damn. Before I get into the goodies, let me share some observations from the magical world of television. * I've posted some rants on beer commercials in the past and have generally stuck with picking on Miller and Budweiser as my main targets. Enter into the fray the latest offerings from Keystone, bottled beer taste in a can. Really!? Terrible beer, no matter what vessel you put it in is, well, terrible. You can put a piece of poo on fine china, and it will still smell, taste and look like poo. Keystone doesn't bother with mentioning how good they think it tastes, they just want you to know that it tastes like it's in a bottle, and not even a vortex bottle (don't get me started). Anyway, their latest spokesperson is a man who looks like he can only afford Keystone. He is the Keystone Man and he carries around a 12 pack looking for assorted models who have gotten stuck in trees (a common occurence, I know). He turns to the camera with his 10 o'clock shadow and a nicotine gleam on his choppers and tells the crowd that the only way he can do these miraculous feats is by the power of Keystone Light. Now, humor in advertising is fine if the product you are selling is actually good. You know why people drink Pabst Blue Ribbon? Price is obviously one, but another is the fact that they really don't try to advertise their crisp, clear taste, when everyone who has ever had one knows it's not very good. They don't create fictional heroes who drink their beer and do stupid shit. You can't laugh at the Keystone man, you only want him arrested for walking around with an open container fondling lost models. Pabst is kicking Keystone's ass in the battle for lower shelf beer rights, and there is nothing the Keystone hero can do about it. Maybe if he found a job, he could afford a beer that would 1. pick up hotter models, and b. not taste like bottled poo taste in a can. * In my last post, I knocked my manliness meter down a couple of notches with a Real World admission. I plan to pump it up a few with this one, at least for the men (with the women I may end up somewhere near the bottom). It's another MTV production called Jackass, and it makes me laugh . . . a lot. They have another movie coming out in 3D and I cannot wait to see it. Let's give these guys a little credit, they have earned millions of dollars throwing pool balls at their groins. They have placed themselves in loaded port-a-potties and tossed their unprotected bodies down mountains, just for the sake of entertainment. Is it stupid? Hell yeah it is. What these guys are doing is insane and beyond the realm of sanity, but the entertainment value of this nonsense is off the charts. Mr. Knoxville actually ended up getting movie contracts and more money, just for (to put it simply) hurting himself. You know what, if a midget wants to kick himself in the head and a giant man in tighty whities wants to whistle down a slide in a tiny helmet and propel himself into a lake (knowing full well he won't make it), more power to me. I hope these guys keep doing this until their 60, that would be even more fun. Ok, I'm hungry lets cook. For the Mole Sauce: 1 can 15 oz of beans in hot chili sauce - undrained .5 cup of chopped onion 2 cloves of garlic .25 cup of tomato sauce 1 tbs of worcestershire sauce .5 tsp of ground cinnamon .5 oz of unsweetened chocolate, chopped fine .25 cup of slivered almonds Once you hunt and gather for all of this stuff, toss it into your food processor or blender and grind until smooth. The sauce is ready. Now for the rest of the meal, I used a slow cooker, but you can cook the chicken ahead of time and heat the sauce in a pan, its up to you. For the Chicken: 4 skinless chicken breasts cut into halves 2 cups of cooked rice (a rice cooker would be nice to have, if not, hit the minute variety.) chopped cilantro - as much as you think you need dollops of sour cream per serving. Ok, take that delicious mole sauce and put a cup of it on the bottom of your slow cooker. Take the chicken and put it over that. Now take the rest of the sauce and place over the chicken. Cover the slow cooker and cook on low for 4-6 hours. You want to make sure the chicken doesn't get tough, so check it if you can. Put the cooked rice on a place, add some chicken and Mole topped with a spoon of sour cream and a little chopped cilantro. Bon appetite. PS - the picture is turned to the left, just pick up you monitor or laptop and turn to appropriate angle.